30 Office Space Movie Quotes

Office Space is one of our favorite films. Even though the film came out in 1999, the jokes and quotes are still relevant today. If you haven’t seen the film, do your self a favor and check it out.

Eight, Bob. So that means that when I make a mistake, I have eight different people coming by to tell me about it. That’s my only real motivation is not to be hassled, that and the fear of losing my job. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.

Peter Gibbons

[hr]

Well-well look. I already told you: I deal with the god damn customers so the engineers don’t have to. I have people skills; I am good at dealing with people. Can’t you understand that? What the hell is wrong with you people?

Tom Smykowski

[hr]

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I’m thinking I might take that new chick from Logistics. If things go well I might be showing her my O-face. “Oh… Oh… Oh!” You know what I’m talkin’ about. “Oh!”

Drew

[hr]

Yeah, we’re going to need to talk about your TPS repots.

Bill Lundbergh

[hr]

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I admit it, I’m a Michael Bolton fan! I celebrate the guy’s entire collection! For my money it doesn’t get any better than when he sings “When a Man Loves a Woman”!

Bob Slydell

[hr]

No! Not again! Why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam! I swear to God one of these days I’m just going to kick this piece of shit out of the window.

Samir

[hr]

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Hi, my name is Steve. I come from a rough area. I used to be addicted to crack but now I am off it and trying to stay clean. That is why I am selling magazine subscriptions.

Steve

[hr]

You know what, Stan. If you want me to wear 37 pieces of flair, like your pretty boy over there, Brian, why don’t you just make the minimum 37 pieces of flair?

Joanna

[hr]

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Bob Porter: Looks like you’ve been missing a lot of work lately.
Peter Gibbons: I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob.

[hr]

Conjugal visits? Not that I know of. Minimum-security prison is no picnic. I have a client in there right now. He says the trick is, kick someone’s ass the first day, or become someone’s bitch. Then everything will be all right. Why do you ask, anyway?

Rob Newhouse

[hr]

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Why don’t you just call me when you grow up! Oh, wait, you know what, that’s probably never gonna happen, so just don’t call me, okay?

Joanna

[hr]

And in light of this sentence for these heinous crimes that you have committed against Initech. I hereby sentence you, Michael Bolton and Samir Na…Ananajibad…to a term of no less than four years in a federal-pound-me-in-the-ass-prison.

Judge

[hr]

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Lawrence: Hey Peter, man! check out channel nine, check out this chick!
Peter Gibbons: Dammit! Lawrence, can’t you just pretend like we can’t hear each other through the wall?
Lawrence: Oh, sorry man! Ann over there or somethin’?
Peter Gibbons: No! But, if you wanna to talk to me, just come over.

[hr]

Oh, and remember, next Friday is Hawaiian shirt day. So, y’know, if you want to, go ahead and uh, wear a Hawaiian shirt and jeans.

Bill Lumbergh

[hr]

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So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, um…every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the worst day of my life.

Peter Gibbons

[hr]

I could put strychnine in the guacamole.

Milton

[hr]

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Michael Bolton: You haven’t even been showing up for work, and you got to keep your job.
Peter Gibbons: Actually, I’m being promoted.

[hr]

Mmm, yeah, I’m going to have to go ahead and ask you to come in on Sunday, too. We’ve got some new people coming in and we… need to play catch-up. Thanks!

Bill Lumbergh

[hr]

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Mr. Lumbergh told me to talk to payroll and payroll told me to talk to Mr. Lumbergh and I still have not received my paycheck and they moved my desk to storage room B and there was… garbage on it.

Milton Waddams

[hr]

We’ll be getting rid of these people here… First, Mr. Samir Naga… Naga… Naga… Not gonna work here anymore, anyway.

Bob Porter

[hr]

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